"Not this Shepherd"

The past weekend I was reminded of a story from my own walk with Christ that really had a profound impact on the way I view God. Since childhood days I was really struggling with the image used in the Bible of the Shepherd. I was struggling to identify with a Good Shepherd because in my mind a shepherd in the natural takes care of the sheep basically for two reasons. They are a source of wool and meat. So caring for the sheep is there, yes, but in the end the shepherd takes care of the sheep to gain something from them - and sometimes it means that he is going to slaughter the sheep and feed them to his family! Sheep means clothes at best and food at worst ... and then the Bible uses this image to describe God's nature to us and it is supposed to make me feel cared for and safe? This did not work very well for me.  

So for years I was walking around with this uneasy feeling about The Shepherd, I think knowing I am missing something here, but not knowing what the missing link was.  Guilt increased because I was feeling guilty that I don't get it and that I apparently could not 'die unto myself' enough to see the love and caring in the 'being a to-be-slaughtered-sheep in the flock of Jesus The Great Shepherd.  As we so often do with issues like this, I was also not talking to the Shepherd about this, because I was thinking I certainly do not want to bring this thought to His attention since that may just trigger the "Yes - and now it is your turn" - answer!  So I mistakenly thought that if I ignore it, it will go away, or at least never get to that point - hoping that maybe I am a "wool-sheep" and will have the grace to live as long as I produce good wool for the Shepherd.  

Ai jai jai... but then the day came that I had to have this discussion with God and I risked to tell Him how I think and feel about the way this image portrays God's nature in scripture.  To my big surprise at that time God actually answered me.  It is pretty ridiculous how I tried to hide the issue from Him - as if He does not know anyway.  He waits for us to take our fears and doubts to Him and risk talking to Him about it in spite of our reservations.  God answered me with only three words - but it was three words that radically changed my understanding of Him as my Shepherd.  Those three words were:

NOT THIS SHEPHERD 

God knew this was all He needed to say, because He knew that through His Spirit over many years, He has built enough into my spirit that I would be able to connect the rest of the dots once I had this missing puzzle piece in my reasoning.  This missing puzzle piece meant that I missed the fact that the nature of God as The Shepherd was completely different from my idea of His nature.  This Shepherd sacrificed Himself for the sheep.  He did not require His Sheep to be sacrificed but came as The Lamb to be slain on our behalf.  In our place.  He became the ultimate Good Shepherd that gave His life so that we can have life - life eternal and life in abundance (John 3:10).  

Let us celebrate this morning the Good Shepherd who loved His sheep so much that He would give His own Son in our place.  (John 3:16)

Psalm 23 - Lize Wiid